Life in a nutshell

All successful life-changing events require us to go through the cycle of competency.

Here it is;
 
Stage 1.
Life-changing event ‘announces’ itself
Feeling of dread or eager anticipation
 
Stage 2.
Unconscious incompetence
No idea of the implications
 
Stage 3.
Conscious incompetence
I need to do something
 
Stage 4.
Conscious competence
I’m learning new skills and behaviours – I’m getting on top of this
 
Stage 5.
Unconscious competence
I’ve got this – it’s embedded and locked in
 
Stage 3 is the tricky one. It’s where we often get stuck, resulting in frustration and stress.
 
We find that we don’t have the awareness, skills, experience and sometimes the energy, to deal with an event that can turn our lives upside down.
 
So what do we do?
 
Fall back on old habits. Muddle our way through. Ignore it.
 
When we move from being a single person to living with someone, do we develop new communication skills and acquire the patience to be a great partner? NO.   
 
When we open a new business are we ready for the massive learning curve we’re about to undergo? NO.
 
We tend not to see the connection between life-changing events and the need for new skills. 
 
So coming back to the cycle, the times I didn’t upskill, I stayed stuck 3. One time,
in order to get out of 3, I hit the eject button, aka divorce

My wonderful client Jack, worked out very quickly, how to move out of step 3 of the cycle.
 
Here’s his awesome story.